Going Back

While it is still fresh on my memory I wanted to go back a bit and post about how we told Evan and how he handled it.

I think I had talked about it before but I knew that Evan would need time to process what was going to happen at the hospital and that we would need to explain it to him a few days before to give him that time. I dreaded telling him and struggled with what to say. There really isn't much to say to make a cath. sound good. I was able to tell him when he had his scan that we would be with him the entire time and that if he was brave we would go home and not have to stay. On the way home the Monday before the cath. I secretly hoped Eric would work late so I could blame not telling him on that I wanted him to be there, no such luck. After dinner I was still sending silent prayers of what in the world I was going to say.

Then it just came to me. I remembered a book and hat Evan had received from the hospital at his OHS called Hero Club - http://www.happyhatsforkids.com/intro.html . Evan likes to pull this book out every once and a while and is very proud reading it - knowing the book will tell him that he is a member of the hero club. This little book tells about a child going into the hospital scared and is given a hat which all the other kids say has magical powers and to put it on. It goes on to explain certain hospital procedures (x-rays, blood draws, IV's, medicine, etc.) and what to expect. The hat comes to life while the child is asleep in surgery and they go on an adventure and he explains that it isn't the hat that is magical at all but that the child was a hero because he was brave and so on. After reading this to Evan I told him there was a reason I had read it and that he was going to the hospital for a cath. He didn't cry... he did ask several questions. One question was, "why does my heart need help?" I looked at him for a moment and remembered the straws I just saw in the kitchen drawer and went and got one and told Evan to blow through it. Then I pinched it and told him to blow through it again. I told him he has an artery that is like a straw that takes blood to his lungs from his heart and it is a little pinched and that they needed to blow through it. Evan seemed okay with this although he did share with a few people that he was going to the hospital to have his straw blown into.

The next few days were full of behavioral issues. It was hard seeing him be so aggressive (more so than usual) and struggle to deal with emotions. Evan's side of one situation was that before T-Ball he and a few friends were running and they started chasing him, he asked them to stop and they didn't so he was starting to cry and they laughed. All we saw was Evan with his arms around the kid taking him down. He said they hurt him and that he was in turn hurting them. He doesn't know how to "play" the game back, he only knows how to respond physically. He doesn't get that at all - he's very aggressive but very tender hearted. We spent an evening this week role playing and using words instead of actions to stop someone from getting a kick out of him crying.

I'll post again later with pictures on how we spent the night last night. He is going to send me to the looney house I'm sure.