Cath Date

I just got the call... Actually I got 2 calls...

They called and said they had gotten their first available appt. in the cath lab, and it was July 1st. She could tell I was upset and asked if I was okay... I told her I just really wished it was sooner so that our hopes of Evan's surgery being earlier and him getting to go back to school with everyone else would be more likely. She said she was sorry and that hopefully they could still work that out despite the late cath date. She called back within 2 minutes and said - I got a call as soon as we hung up with a cancellation of June 16th and I can put Evan down for it and its first case in the morning. I felt so relieved! Thank you God! I know that surgery could still come late enough in the summer that he can't go back to school on time but, the earlier date gives us a better chance at that being able to happen. I also hated that Evan would have another month to think about this cath. He has been struggling with this news and the sooner it is behind him the better. He is my brave boy! He brings tears to my eyes talking about it... "So Mom... Dr. said I didn't have to take versed if I didn't want - that we would just walk in the lab together and I could put on my own mask - I'm so glad I'm not taking versed. Mom... after the pictures Dr. sends them to Dr. A at heart board and then I have surgery..." Sigh... you can't lie to him - the truth is that's right - and why does my 6 year old know that here in Louisville they have heart board to discuss patients - sigh. I just keep telling him that, that might happen but to remember how well he did last time and that he will do that well again. We have had 3 kids recently in our heart support group have surgery and they have all done really well. I think this has helped Evan know that, that is usually the case. His best heart buddy is wearing a holter monitor today and broke down leaving the appointment after having it put on. He told his Mom, "I don't want a special heart, I want God to take it away. I still want to have a heart team and do the heart walk and games but I want to do it for other people, not me." What do you say? I had a hard day yesterday and I'm emotional today and angry and humble and blessed. So many emotions and I'm an adult. When Evan's busy he seems to be doing well... but you can definately tell he is worried if their is a quiet moment or if he is going to have to leave me for a while. He will say things like, E-Hold my hand Mommy. M-okay, are you okay E- yeah it is just dark outside. After a few moments he said E-Is it June yet Mommy, M-yes, today is June 1st. E- I wish it wasn't, I'm having a cath this month." Breaks my heart.

Sharing pictures from Mother's Day. We went to a really neat farm that serves lunch and dinner - almost like a Bed & Breakfast but there aren't any nightly accomodations. We had a wonderful day and I'm so thankful that God made me Evan's Mommy and for my Mom!